Meal Suggestion Competition

So I've been thinking, all the recipes I've posted are ones I created because I like them. But what do you like? In the comment section below (you have to follow to leave a comment) tell me what you want me to create. I will only pick one. My criteria for my choice will be as follow:

• Something yummy and creative
• Something I haven't experimented much with before
• Something easy enough for people at home to give a try BUT
• Something difficult enough to give me a challenge

The winner will get the recipe posted on the web, and a bottle of some really good hot sauce I got from Tobago. Its home-made, home-bottled, all natural and no preservatives. I bought two bottles for myself, but this stuff is so hot, its lasting a lot longer than I expected, so the other one is up for grabs.

BEST OF LUCK TO YOU ALL!

-Punk Chef

Best BBQ ribs

So I think I've finally mastered the perfect barbecued pork ribs. If you follow this recipe, and use my recipe for rub and BBQ sauce, you'll get meat that falls right off the bone, with a crispy coating, and the perfect combination of sweet and spicy. I have cooked ribs in many different ways, but I was most satisfied with this method.



Pork baby back ribs (as many racks as needed)
Standard Dry Rub
Yummy-Sticky BBQ Sauce

1. The first step to ribs is the hardest: removing the membrane. Most people don't even realize there is a membrane on the ribs, but its there, and its got an unpleasant chew to it, as well as it stops the penetration of flavour from the rub and sauce. Sometimes the membrane comes off in one nice peel, sometimes it takes a long time, and sometimes its better to just give up than waste your whole time doing it. Its one of the most frustrating tasks when it doesn't work nicely, but so satisfying when it does. As its easier to show you than explain it, here's a video from someone else on the internet:
   
   This guy does a very good job at removing the membrane, and a very good job at explaining it. The membrane is also very fatty and slippery, so you can also use a pair of pliers to help get a grip. If your pliers are too dirty, just cover the end with a bit of tin-foil.
2. Once the membrane is removed, set ribs on a flat surface, and generously season both sides with your dry rub. Rub all over with your fingers, and make sure to get into every nook and cranny. I used to leave it marinating for 24 hrs ahead of time, but I discovered that if you leave it marinating for too long, the salt dehydrates the meat, and results in less tender ribs. 2-4 hours should be plenty of time for the flavour to penetrate the meat. While the ribs are marinating, leave them sealed tight in a bag or plastic wrap, placed in a dish (to keep any escaping meat juice from leaking) in the fridge.
3. Heat one side of your barbecue at minimum. Oil the grates over the side without any flame underneath using a paper towel or a silicon brush. If your barbecue is too small you might have to cut your ribs into sections, but if you have the room on your grill, leave them whole. The less surface area, slower the ribs will cook, and the more tender they will be.
4. Constantly flip and watch your ribs, about every 10 minutes, even if it doesn't seem like the side that was face down has made any cooking progress: the idea is to have both sides relatively at the same temperature. However keep the lid down as much as possible. Remember, you are cooking with indirect heat meaning there is no flame under the meat you are cooking. That means the ribs you are cooking rely on circulation of the heat within a closed environment, so if the lid's open, there will be very little heat to cook the meat.

   

   Me flipping my ribs in my 2-tone suspenders
   

5. Keep this process running for about 40 minutes, then you can start saucing your ribs. Flip the ribs just as constantly as before, but now every time you flip, sauce. Just like when you rubbed your ribs, get the sauce into every nook and cranny. This is best done with a silicon brush - fiber brushes often lose their hairs in the sauce on the ribs, and no one wants that in their food.
6. Keep flipping and saucing for another 20 minutes about, or until meat near the bone reaches 200 degrees F with meat thermometer. You can do the last flip without saucing so that the sauce already on it cooks to be nice a crispy.
7. Remove ribs from grill and place onto a cutting board. Let sit for 5-10 minutes and lets juices accumulate. With your tongs, balance the ribs on the edge, like my poor drawing in paint below:
   
   
   This makes it easier to cut along the bone, and keep the meat from falling apart. I find its easier for the concave side to be facing you. Cut into individual ribs and serve.
   
   
   
   

French Fries

One more thing to do with potatoes, french fries!

Ingredients:
Potatoes
Salt
Pepper
Canola Oil

1) Skin potatoes
2) Dice potatoes in to very thin strips
3) In a colander rinse potato strips thoroughly, until the water runs through them clear. It's important to remove the starch
4) Freeze overnight. If you dont have a freezer let them sit in water.
5) Deep fry in canola oil at 375 degree for about 10 minutes. You can use a pot on top of a stove for this but be careful not to get burned.
6) Salt and pepper immediately. For variation add garlic salt or Cayene pepper. Experiment!
7) Dont feed them to anyone else no matter how much they ask. You deserved this, you fat fuck.

This might take more time than running out to McDonalds but it's also pretty fucking awesome.


More life tips at Modern Ape.

Potatoes!

So when you're making meal, you wanna make sure you get a balance of all the essential nutrients. You need your amino acids: the monomers (building blocks) of proteins, which you can get from your meats and alternatives. You need your fats, which you can get from your meats as well as the fats you choose to cook with (butter, oil, etc.). You need your vitamins and minerals, which can be found in your fruits and veggies. And you need glucose. Glucose forms many poly-saccharides, but the one easiest to digest (and with fewer additional saccharides, which can be noted as less healthy) by a human is starch. Starch is the method plants use to store glucose, so it is found in all fruits and veggies, but in particular: potatoes and rice. I've already done a post on rice (click here to see it), but now its time to show you a few of my favourite ways of doing potatoes.

Oven-fried:

Potatoes
Olive oil or Canola oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Wash your potatoes, then decide whether you want them peeled or not (with the peel is healthier, but some people are allergic to it). Then you can decide how you wanna cut em up. You can french-fry cut em, cut into wedges or dice em into any size. The smaller the pieces, the more surface area, the shorter it will take to cook. Grease a large, oven-safe dish (pyrex, corningware, etc.) with your oil, and cover with one layer of potatoes. Drizzle some oil over the potatoes and turn to coat. Sprinkle with salt and fresh coarse-ground black pepper. Repeat this process layer after layer until the dish is full and cook uncovered at 350 degrees F. The size of the potato pieces will determine the length they will take to cook.
**If you decided to do french fries, then cook on a flat sheet, in a single layer. Avoid having the fries touch each other.**
This method of doing potatoes is yummy and healthy, and not too fattening as they're not deep-fried. Dip with your favourite dipping sauce, whether it be ketchup, honey mustard, mayo, chipotlé, ranch or my Creamy-Ceasar dressing. Mix it up with some yams or sweet potatoes. Leftovers are perfect for Sunday brunch hash browns.

Cheezy-Italian:

Potatoes
Olive oil or Canola oil
Salt and Pepper to taste
Italian herbs
Parmesan, Romano and/or Asiago cheese

Wash your potatoes, peel if desired, and cut into a medium dice. Grease an oven safe dish, and layer with potatoes and drizzle with oil, turning to coat. Sprinkle with salt, fresh coarse-ground black pepper and your choice of Italian herbs. No name brand has a bag of pre-mixed, dried Italian herbs, including parsley, thyme, oregano, basil, rosemary and others. Again stir to coat with the seasonings. Repeat this process layer after layer until the dish is full. Cook at 350 degrees F uncovered until potatoes are fork-tender, about 40 minutes. Sprinkle a layer of the cheese(s) you chose, and cook until cheese is golden on the top. Enjoy with your favourite dipping sauce (goes really well with my creamy ceasar dressing).

Creamy-Mashed:

Potatoes
Butter
Cream-cheese
Garlic - minced (or garlic powder or garlic salt)
Salt, pepper
Italian herbs

Wash and peel your potatoes, and cut up into large, even pieces. Boil in a large pot with salted water, until fork runs smoothly through the potato. Drain most of the water, leaving a small amount in. The reason for this is the water now contains starch and flavour from the potatoes, and you don't want to drain it all away. If you used a tefflon pot to boil the potatoes, transfer them to a large bowl. If you used a stainless steel pot, leave em in the pot. Using an electric mixer, beat the potatoes at high speed into a smooth, thick puree (if you do this in a tefflon pot, the tefflon layer will scrape off into your food, ruining both the potatoes and the pot). Add your desired amount of butter, cream-cheese, garlic, salt, pepper and herbs, so that it forms a smooth, creamy and delicious concoction. You can use any regular cream-cheese, but you can also use an expensive flavoured cream-cheese, like Boursin (which could save you from adding the garlic and herbs). This recipe is a little high in fat, but the taste will knock the socks off yourself and anyone you cook it for, and sure beets the the dry 'n' bland mashed potatoes you usually get.

Baked-Potato:

Potatoes
Optional toppings:
Butter
Salt and pepper
Sour cream
Green onions or chives, 1/4" slice
Grated cheddar
Bacon bits 

Wash and dry your potatoes (the drying process is very important to avoid mushiness). Wrap in tin-foil and bake in the oven at 350-400 degrees F (Temp isn't totally important here) or bury in the hot embers of a slow burning fire in your fireplace or if you're camping. If you do decide to bake em in a fire, double wrap the potatoes in tin-foil, to prevent the ash from penetrating your potatoes. Cook until skin is easily pierced with a blunt butter knife, and the inside is fork tender. Serve with your favourite toppings.
Go the extra mile and make the supreme baked potato. Once your potatoes are fully cooked, remove the tin foil and cut each potato in half length-wise. Cover a baking sheet with aluminum foil for easy cleaning, and place the potatoes flat side facing up. Press down on the middle of each potato with a fork, so that its semi-mashed and its formed a sort of concave bowl. place a bit of butter in each potato, and sprinkle with salt and fresh coarse-ground black pepper. Spoon a small layer of sour cream onto each potato, sprinkle with green onions or chives, and top with grated cheddar cheese and bacon bits. Bake in the oven until the cheese is melted and slightly crispy and golden.

So there you have it. There are many ways of making delicious potatoes without using store-bought frozen fries with tons of preservatives and other unwanted and unhealthy ingredients.

Beer Can Chicken

Two beer can chickens after carving

So this is a meal for you beer lovers out there. This recipe is fairly basic, but takes a lot of time. The only trick is finding the right beer for the job. You'll also need a big barbecue with a high lid. As the chicken cooks, the beer will steam and will be absorbed by the chicken. This allows for super moist chicken. This was part of my 19th Birthday dinner, and I got lots of positive feed back from it.

1 whole chicken
1 can of beer
Olive oil
Lemon juice
Dry Rub

1. If your chicken comes with extra goodies (neck, liver etc.) remove them and do what you want with em (these come in handy as a special treat for your cat or dog). Wash your chicken inside and out with cold water. Pat dry with paper towels.
2. In a small bowl mix 1 part olive oil with 1 part lemon juice (I think one Tbsp of each should do the trick), and lightly rub it over the entire outside of your chicken. Make sure to only put a small layer of this; too much and it will mix with your dry rub to form a paste and it won't stick to your chicken.
3. Generously season and rub with my "Standard Dry Rub" with your index and middle finger joined together. If you put too much of the olive-oil-lemon-juice mixture on the chicken then the dry rub will mix with it and form a paste, and it won't stick to the chicken as nicely. The best you can do in this scenario is to mush the "paste" to flatten it as much as possible to coat the chicken.
4. Seal in a tight bag and refrigerate and allow the seasoning to sink in and penetrate the meat. I'd say the best timing for this is about 2 hours - any less and the meat won't be as flavoured, and any more and the salt will dehydrate the meat and it won't be as moist.
5. Now comes the beer. Choosing the right beer can be tough. The last beer I used for this was Okanagan Spring Pale Ale, and it worked fairly well. When heated, the alcohol content in the beer will evaporate, but everything else will be absorbed by the chicken. This is why you want to use a beer that is filled with lots of flavour (lots of hops and strong malts used in the making of the beer). Usually this flavour can be found in the colour of the beer - the darker the beer, the more flavour will probably be in it. Usually these beers are quite bitter as well (sweet beers are not ideal for this recipe, as there is enough sweetness in the rub). I would suggest ales and porters and stouts; do NOT  use a lager - they are too light in colour, flavour and are usually quite sweet.
6. Once you've chosen a beer that you're satisfied with, pour half of it into a glass. Gulp down that beer, have another whole one for good luck, then light only half of your barbecue, put the lid down and let it heat up. Lower the flame down to minimum.



Two hens on the can

7. Grab your chicken, a leg in each hand and lower it onto the beer can so that the beer can slides into the chicken. Cover the unlit part of your barbecue with aluminum foil and place the chicken standing upright on the aluminum, the can and two legs acting like a tripod to hold itself up. The reason for cooking the chicken upon the unlit part of your barbecue is for indirect heat. If the chicken is over top a flame (direct heat), it will be too hot, and the outside of the chicken will be burned while the inside remains raw.
8. Cook for 1hr 15min to 1hr 30min or until meat thermometer reads 165 degrees F in the breast, and 180 degrees F in the thigh (reference: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/the-surreal-gourmet/beer-can-chicken-recipe/index.html).
9. Remove from heat and let it sit for 10 minutes and let the juices accumulate. Carve. Eat. Enjoy.